All week I\’ve been feeling it. An unrest, a peaceful lack of peace, a restlessness. I look inside to see what is the cause…is there unconfessed sin, is there a place of unrepentance, is fear present–what is it?
I think, but can\’t say for sure, it is the energy, the atmosphere of spring. The restless chomping at the bit feel of spring is rumbling around inside of me. Am I sensitive to it? Maybe, or maybe God is just giving me a taste of it, so I better understand what I see/feel/hear/touch.
What happens in spring? New life buds, babies are born, chicks hatch, grass greens up, trees bud, animals mate. The air is rife with new-ness: new possibilities, fresh starts, infant sightings. A lot of energy is needed to birth spring, just like a lot of energy is needed to birth anything. That energy has a urgency about it (ask any birthing mother if this isn\’t so), a restless feel to it. A positive, life-giving pushiness is present.
Our dog, Buster, although in his late 80\’s in dog years, emulates it yet again this spring. He wants to go, then to come in, then to go out, then to come in, then to go out…on and on it goes. He runs around like a pup and has brightened considerably in the past few weeks. He smells it, he sees it, he senses it–spring has a certain restlessness to it, a certain joy permeates it.
Inside I feel something akin to what I\’m trying to explain here. I must admit I try to sit on it, try to keep it from bursting forth, I want to control it and not have it control me. I don\’t know this sensation so am hesitant to trust that I wouldn\’t be overcome by it. But then again, maybe being overcome by lifegiving joy, by new inner life isn\’t something to be shunned. Maybe letting spring in, letting the message of Easter splash me with glee is worth losing control over.
As I spot bunnies bobbing about, hear endless varieties of bird calls, witness perennials popping up, I somehow feel their busy, busy spring activity. Or maybe what I really sense is God\’s busy, busy birthing activity in my own life. Or, maybe they hold hands–maybe Easter and spring happen simultaneously in our inner lives now and again. Maybe this spring contains a personal Easter for me. Maybe this Easter season contains a personal spring for me. Dare I let it out? Dare I let joy show? Dare I surrender to Him and His blessing and let Life burst forth in a hue-filled bloom?
Come God of Easter, come Jesus the Christ, come and bring Your new life, Your Spirit, and let a spiritual Spring begin…